it’s friday night. the friday before a major holiday. and, i am…at the local bookstore down the street from my house. reading. writing. working (only minimally, though). being…*dare i say it*…content.
seem weird? so be it. you should probably stop reading now, if you think so.
one thing i’ve learned on my journey thus far is…my path is my path. period.
so, yes. it’s friday. the friday before a major holiday and…the invites (yes, plural) came. i declined some and ignored others. i’m not popular. no. trust me, that’s not it. i am just the goodtimecharlie that people want around to feel good about whatever it is that they need to feel good about. i am fun. no cockiness…just fact. but, alas. i am not with any of them. i am…alone. on a friday night. the friday night before a major holiday.
the last few years of life have shown me some different things. about myself. and, other people:
- i rarely mind being alone;
- i would welcome (#ithink) a companion if HE sent me one, but, the fear of losing ”mytime” scares me a lil’ bit…#beentheredonethat;
- i enjoy hanging out and all that that entails, but i don’t hafta always have it;
- i don’t have nearly the number of true friends that most people think i do;
- i don’t like what most people like;
- i’m busier than a lot of people i know;
- i am moody…terribly so;
- i am often pleased, blissful even, with the very simple things in life;
- i am increasingly less patient with the foolish, selfish, mean, fraudelent souls on this earth and am often driven to roll dolo because of it;
- i am very sensitive, despite the seemingly hard exterior;
at the end of the day…i’ve learned to see people for what they are and not what i want them to be. i think i do this because ultimately it’s what i want from them. dah well. #irambleiramble